her parents thought something was "off" when she called them and told them she had "fallen in love" with Cruise.
I know, right?  Seriously, who says that, something so removed and clinical about something as personal as falling in love, almost like she's talking about someone else?  

What scenario person to make an announcement like that, to her parents, of all people?  I'll tell you: Someone who has just acquired, or maybe won, something big, like a new house or car. 

Or a multi-million-dollar beard contract.